The Timer Has Stopped

Time has run out for excuses… Many of us have more reasons why we cannot do something. We cannot do anything because we have never attempted or tried to do anything. We are so defeated by our excuses as to why we cannot do?

How many obstacles have you placed in your life today, just simply by stating that I will do it tomorrow?

Do you know how many people never live to see another day?

Do you know that putting off what can be done today for tomorrow is not promised to any of us?

Expiration is not based on age, race, color or creed; we all have an expiration date.

Do you ever ask yourself, why am I always making excuses?  Is it due to fear? Are you afraid that you will fail?

Don’t you know that many great discoveries and successes in life were due to failed attempts. We will never know what we can do until we try. Some of us will put a barrier up and just say, “I am not ready.” Saying that you are not ready and not attempting is just another excuse.

Time will run out if we keep putting things off. We can only put off things for so long and time will run out and if you are around to reflect you will say, “I should have, I could have, I would have, but you did not. Remember that almost doesn’t count. Either you did or did not do it. Let’s stop wasting time by filling it up with more reasons why not then I can. Think of the Little Engine that could…when he tried; he knew that he could. Nothing can ever happen if we never try.

Stop! At this very moment write down at least ten things that are a priority that you continue to put off. Reflect over that list for a moment, is there anything off that list that can be done at this very moment? Is there anything on your list that will not take longer than 10 minutes to do?

No more excuses start tackling your list today. Prioritize your life…if you must create a schedule for yourself, do so. At some point we are going to have to just do it. And remember the longer that we put off doing things the more we will have to do when we finally tackle it.

For instance, if you have only one load of laundry today and you continue to put it off for a month, how many loads of laundry will you have to do at this time. Wouldn’t it have been much easier to do a load a week or to not go past the two-week mark. Not only do you have to wash and fold the clothes you must put them away. This is only one area in our lives that we must prioritize but imagine if we simplified as many areas in our lives as possible, how easier our lives would be and the time we would have on our hands just for ourselves?

It is not about how we feel this is the easiest way for us to make an excuse. We must mustard up the strength to do the things that need to be done in a timely manner. Remember that excuses put us farther away from fulfilling our commitments, goals and dreams.  No more excuses …the timer has stopped.

It’s Me or the Grave

We are being slaughtered everyday by the very people that confess to loving and caring for us. Everyday that we remain in unhealthy relationships (marriages, friendships, Kinship), we are sub-coming to sickness or and early death.

Until each of us learn to love ourselves, we cannot love anyone else. What most of us do not understand is that love is not about you all the time. Many of us proclaim to love vocally only, no action or substance to prove your love for another.

It is very disheartening when someone say that they love you but you cannot feel it.

When you are pulling all the weight and they just stand on the side line watching but never offering to help you carry the load. Many will use the excuse, “you did not ask for my help?”

Do you really need to be asked?

What happened to just roll up your sleeves and jumping in to assist where it is needed?

You can turn yourself into a doormat and those that say that they love you will wipe their feet on you and keep stepping on you day after day. Things will continue this way until you learn that loving yourself is important. It is important to your health, mind, body, spirit, and well-being. You need to love you in order to sustain. When you are dealing with others that you love and they don’t know what love is, you must set boundaries.

I always say, if I am 10 on your list then you are 10 on my list. Why should I make you #1 and I am only #10 on your list? I know that it is easy to say that we should not have any expectations of others, but I beg the differ. Sometimes we need someone or others to be there for us. Sometimes emergencies arise and we need those very ones to show up and show out, unfortunately, those are the very ones that deflate our spirits every time.

Sometimes people find out about love only in death. This is the inevitable; they no longer have a crutch; the person that they thought that they could always count on, no matter what. If it is not death then you may find the will to walk away because you have become fed-up and have had enough. Now, you are told that you have changed, became cold-hearted and bitter or you just do not care.

No one ever expect someone to stop caring; you are supposed to continue to love, care, give and love unconditionally. You are supposed to wait for others to mature or allow them time after time to get it right. Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust…when will that be?

Sickness or death for whom?

Set boundaries with everyone, especially with those that say they care but are never available when you need them. Saying no and letting go is never easy but is it worth your health? Is it worth your life?

If others are not there for you when you are strong and healthy, where will they be when you are sick?

Many of them will be the common denominator in the failing of your health. There isn’t anything anyone can do for you after death. Life is for the living…enjoy life and live it to the fullest. Surround yourself with those that are there for you and show up and show out, to show you that not only do they care but to remind you that you matter.

Written by -L.J. on 02/07/2019

Meeting a friend for Brunch with a gift in hand is a nice gesture. You attract more bees with honey. Share the gift of kindness.

L.J. 02/23/2019

Bright Lights or Dimmers

Many of times when we look in the mirror, we are not looking at our true selves; we are thinking that we are either to big or to small; we simply do not like who we see in the mirror. It is not until we are alone with our thoughts in our inner personal space where we truly examine ourselves.

We truly see who we are. Who we are is not an outward appearance because a wolf can disguise himself in sheep’s clothing!

Our inward appearance is what highlights, our outward appearance. Who are you?

Have you ever seen people step out of their homes dressed to the nine but whenever you have entered the inside of their homes you would say, is this the same person?

Our insides should match our outer appearance but often this is not the case because we are impersonating someone else. We all have issues but some of us have more extreme issues then others.

Some of us are willing to see the inside of us and try to do some self-reflection and improvement of ourselves. Some of us know deep down inside who we are but refuse to change the things that we keep our lights from shining brighter. Some of us are just rotten to the core but insanity, ego, self-righteousness, and vanity keeps our lights dim and people are afraid to have a relationship with us.

You are dangerous and some of you know it and believe that you like who you are, but you truly do not. The proof is in the pudding, you are lonely and starving for attention. Your mind is saying one thing, but your actions is saying it all.

*** I am afraid* I am lonely * I want to be loved * I don’t know how *I am hurting***

But you keep trying to convince yourself that you could do without all of this but why be overly concerned when no one wants to be in your company.

Are you the elephant in the room?

Do you change the mood of the environment within a group setting? Are you in denial? Do you need to work on yourself? As one of my good friends would say, “I know when I get on my own nerves.”

When you can recognize your own idiosyncrasies and how it makes you feel, imagine what it would do to someone else? Don’t dish it if you cannot take it.

We will all meet our match and it is no fun to be challenged unnecessarily. Healthy challenging allows us to grow in compassion, wisdom, and understanding but foolery at its finest is a headache.

Are you a Bright light or are you a dimmer?

Micromanagement does not work; research has proved this.

For those supervisors and managers that are always walking around checking to see what their employees are doing, finding small minuet things to concern themselves with. I believe that they have too much time on their hands.

They should roll up their sleeves and jump in to assist with the workload. Some superiors seem to have more concerns with the employees that stay to themselves and can multitask but meet their productivity goals.

I know that many companies prefer their employees to not be on their cellphones during work hours, but some employees work better if they are able to multitask. What needs to be considered is that employees are not going to produce no more than they desire.

You must remember that you have doers and those who are not going to do. It does not matter if there is an incentive or not.

Why is it that we envisioned the workplace much different than the world? The workplace is filled with people from all walks of life, they are just confined to a much smaller space.

Some superiors like to speak loudly so that they can be heard throughout out the office when they approach you at your desk about a work-related issue.

Is this an ego thing or is this a childhood issue resurfacing?

Some employees are not at all interested in being friends are rubbing elbows with their superiors and this should be respected; nor taken as an insult nor as disrespect. Those employees that work very hard at making their bosses feel important are often pretending so that they stay off the radar.

Many employees believe that they must treat their superiors a certain way in order to protect their jobs.

We are not children; we do have the right to choose. We come to work for one common cause; to produce revenue for the company. We do not come to work to make friends, we can be cordial.

I do not believe in participating in work events that I do deem necessary.

If you treat me as if I do not deserve your respect, why would I participate in an employee appreciation, recognition, or any type of team building exercise or experience?

Especially, when you know that it is not sincere, and you are not valued and respected as an employee.

Many times, superiors will retaliate against their employees if they believe that they gave a bad evaluation or have made complaints about their leadership style. Not everyone makes a great boss and not all employees are the model employee. Lead by example.

Not all employees stand for nothing and fall for anything. Not all employees are comfortable with pretending; in layman’s term…play the game.

It is okay to not be liked by my superiors; be it I do not conform or adhere to what you think I should be by not participating in anything that is not mandatory. This should be respected; just allow me what should be allowed to all employees.

Don’t try to retaliate against me, place false information in my employee file, or make other employees afraid to interact with me because you have made things personal.

Get to know your employees and you will come to understand who they are.

Many people behave the same in their work lives as they do in their personal lives. That’s if they are not pretending but even so there are things about their personality and character that will give you a true evaluation of who they are.

You cannot treat someone with disrespect and expect them to treat you with the upmost respect. Respect is mutual. “Do unto others as you will have them to do unto you.”

Written by: -L.J. 01/15/2019

Who’s responsible for the hardening of your heart?

Many of us have allowed bitterness to block the valves to our hearts. This valve blockage is not allowing the proper flow of blood to reach our brains which has frizzled our thinking.

Some of us seem to believe that we are the only ones affected by the hurdles of life. We think that no one understands or has endured similar things in life.

Many of us are affected by heart worms and if we do not rid our hearts of the worms we are surely going to die. You will leave this world with a heart filled with bitterness, hurt, anger; everything minus love and kindness.

Some of us have atherosclerosis which is a condition caused by plaque that forms along the walls of the arteries. Many of us are plaque by hate, resentment, and unforgiveness that we have allowed to block the flow of love to enter our hearts.

We do not feel good ourselves…

We do not love ourselves…

We are desensitized to the needs and feelings of others. We hurt others without a care or a belief that we are hurting someone else. We use our own hurt as a defense mechanism hoping that others will see that we are hurting.

We refuse treatment that can help fix our heart problems; we refuse take the medicine. We keep holding on to the pain. We are selfish, self-centered; everything is about us. We do not believe that we are the reason why our heart condition is not improving; we are not following the doctor’s orders.

Seek the treatment that is needed to fix your heart issues.

Do not allow your heart problems to become irreversible. Do not go into cardiac arrest or develop congestive heart failure because you want let go of past hurt and pain.

Many of us are holding on to things from our childhood.

No one is the remote control to your life. Only you have the power to change the channel or to turn off the set. We all have the power to release and let go.

Some of us will not beg another one’s pardon, even if they asked for it. Some of us have a heart that is so cold that even a blood transfusion of warm blood could not melt it to allow our hearts to pump it.

Get your examination today; put it off no longer if you want to live a vibrant and healthy life. Release, let go, and love.

Written by: -L.J. 01/14/2019